Not All Trump Voters Are Morons!

By Gaston Lighterman, Ph.D., SoDUM

First of all, I am extremely proud to place my name on the by-line of this article. I am reporting on the breakthrough psychoscamoloy study released this week from my alma mater, The Generic Institute of Technology at the University of California, Sonova Beach. My former colleagues, Drs. Heinz Jaegerschotts, Maggie Müschromm, and Si Kadellick have published a monumental report correcting a long held belief that every person who voted for Donald Trump was either a low IQ bigoted idiot or an unfortunate victim of the dreaded flunky pox virus.

Not True! Says Jaegerschotts, Müschromm and Kadellick in their 800 page study called "Explaining Trumpism in the Intelligent Individual". Their research spanned nearly ten years. While many of Trump's MAGA supporters are indeed moronic excuses for human beings, many are educated, hard working contributors to society. The paper goes on to say "evidence strongly supports the concept of suspension of disbelief being used by alternative news sources to make Trump and his policies appear palatable to these otherwise normal people."

We already know that suspension of disbelief is critical for viewers and readers of Science Fiction and Fantasy movies and literature. This is critical, because if taken as factual, all such fiction will be easily dismissed as unrealistic and not entertaining. The authors note humans have a great capacity to accept bovine fecal matter if presented in an amusing manner. Skillful manipulation of facts, presentation of one-sided arguments and sheer out right lying can have this effect on even the above mentioned educated persons.

A case example is given where a Trump supporter is informed of an outrageous Trump comment. His reply was "that was taken out of context". Another example had a test subject shown actual photographs of Trump offering to desecrate a Hebrew prayer book. The response was "did he really say that? I can't believe it." Many more reports and incidents were presented in this study, giving an insight as to why fascism, authoritarianism, loss of democratic principles and other assaults on our basic human freedoms are being ignored or even condoned. Subject quotes ranged from "this was long overdue", "we never needed that freedom anyways", "we're finally getting rid of waste, fraud and abuse", "Biden was the real criminal here", "Trump loves our country and has sacrificed his own wealth to lead us" and "these steps are necessary to get rid of illegal immigrant criminal aliens—even if they're American citizens".

All copies of this report have been confiscated by the US Department of Justice and the three authors have been arrested and deported to El Salvador. UC Sonova Beach has had all its federal grants cancelled. "This is not retaliatory," says one Trump official. "These actions have been taken to prevent the rise of Anti-Semanticism on this campus."