Pete Hegseth

Accomplishments: Weekend Fox news anchor, has suspiciously white supremacist tattoos, confirmed alcoholic, threw an axe and hit a drummer in the US Military Academy band causing injury, sexual assault allegations, alleged financial mismanagement and alcoholism in veteran groups he led, let unauthorized people into an unsecured chat line which discussed top secret military attack plans—twice! (That we know of). Narrowly confirmed 51-50 with Vance’s vote! Renamed Fort Liberty to honor Confederate General Bragg (oops we mean WWII vet Roland L. Bragg), opposed Ukraine entering NATO, invited alt-right political activist to accompany him, reduced Defense Dept. funding on most programs, fired top generals. Signalgate, Signalgate, Signalgate. Need we say more?
Qualifications: None, actually. Besides, what part of Signalgate says he's qualified?
Philosophy: Oh, show me the way to the next whiskey bar. Oh, you know why…